UPROOTED
M(art)a Feyles
Longing
an ongoing gravimetric study of distance. (3 of 1500 km)
Longing’s conception occurred almost a decade ago.
It brewed itself all along from an absence, from that remaining hole in the ground when I uprooted on a sunny, autumn day. The mountainous landscape and its white peaks that I could see flawlessly passing by was what I called home.
The work finally came into being in 2021, the rhythmic folding of the yarn, just like prayer beads passing through my fingers, becoming an anaesthetic to the perceived vastness of the distance between myself and my family.
How much does distance weigh? I wonder.
The crocheted string is the umbilical cord that was once severed – Ariadne’s lifeline moored in the memory of a proximity – if it’s held tightly, I can navigate, wander and explore uncharted territories without hesitance and with comfort.
Longing wants to incorporate points of departure and arrival, transits and journeys. Addressing this marks the starting point of my practice, I channel the distance, as an intrinsic, procreative spark that keeps me on the edge between turmoil and respite.
and growing.
This work is a reflection upon the weight of distance, and its materialised vitality. Longing tests my own resilience in the form of an embodied life-long commitment. It corresponds to the distance between both my homes, a line that overcomes borders and nationalities. It encapsulates a paradox; a performative act of love and labour, and an apparent futile attempt to reach out to others and to faraway communities.
This project has its origin in notions of quantum entanglements and networkism across time and space. Based on quantum theory, it appears that there is an absence of (empty) space as a dimension, due to the intangible presence of dark matter. However, for our senses and physical boundaries, distance is still perceived as real. By approaching entanglements as the distance between two opposing entities, I seek that instant in which they can meet halfway.
The crochet string, made of a simple chain stitch, is aimed to arrive to my roots. The line conveys a metaphor for walking and travelling which is juxtaposed to the making and winding of the thread, whilst expressing their shared qualities of repetition, rhythmical rituals and contemplative immersion.
Transits
the dung beetle ongoing photo album.
Dear you,
I am taking you for a walk and a drive today. You measure 2 km and yet here you are already demanding more, hungry for thought, for stories, for beginnings, and ends. I could stand up, then you would no longer be rocking forwards and backwards as I feed you more thread. You would be balancing on my left hip in a breathing oscillation - up, down, up, down. My stance is so awkward. I see traits of a mother whose posture bears the passage of another lump - once straight, then with a slight tilt, a juncus swept permanently by the touch of the wind. As the alter being, you are shaping me. Neither a decorative nor a functional entity, you can't be placed down to collect only dust, nor be worn as armour. Shyness is an attribute that I cannot label you with anymore; your increasing presence interrogates my ownership, my intention. It takes my breath away, it shakes me like a leaf, but I don't fall. I just freeze. A baby becoming rebellious in its upbringing, a reminder of the clock ticking relentlessly. Are you sceptical of my diligence? Would I ever leave you behind?
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The embodiment of an action that has been materialised in locus. This sequence of images have been produced with the intent of documenting the growth of Longing; the aftermath of a performative event and the temporary suspension of a task in favour of a short pilgrimage. A small selection from a growing chronicle of images, one for each kilometre, for the time until it is humanly possible to move the object about. Just like a child’s collection of images that show the bodily changes throughout its upbringing.
The ongoing series questions the occurrence of an anthropomorphic imposition of extended inner workings. As a transitory synthesis of an experience of being in constant becoming, the orb is succinct, yet it expands inwards. A fictitious void that can be filled with one’s own narratives, doubts and wonders. Transits are imbued with the alienating feeling of being in-between, of welcomes and goodbyes – the being in continuous motion that warps one’s perception of place, of belonging and pursuit for something other, perhaps for something more.
Nostos
homecoming.
Edited down from a three-hour long performance, this video displays the set of repetitive gestures employed for the making of a segment of Longing . Inspired by Bas Jan Ader’s 1975 work In Search for the Miraculous, Nostos presents my journey home. The title has been influenced by a theme in Greek mythology and literature; translated as ‘homecoming’, it explores a return to one’s roots – an inner drive to endure farewells and to seek answers in the unknown whilst being infused with hope of finding one’s way back.
The moving image speculates the possibility of travel through immobility, it documents an interplay of dichotomies – a wish to be away and yet nearby, perhaps only possible through a re-enactment of past memories and erratic daydreaming. Throughout the video, I have implied calculations made for the measurements of Longing. A methodical approach to distance that leaves me confronted by a colossal task, if implemented correctly. The spherical entanglement would reach the diameter of 3.2 m and weigh 2.5 tonnes, its string, if unravelled, would unfold a distance of 1500 km. If its extremities were held, would we feel each other’s pull?
This video addresses the subjective experience of distance, of the impossibility of being physically in two places at once. Filmmaking has been employed to superimpose distinct locations to reflect upon the viewer’s own experience of distance and journey. The dream-like state dictated by the well-known sound of rails, announcements and flight evokes the non-linear quality of memory and its tendency to be manipulated. In those instances of relative stillness, imagination is cut loose, let to wander far and wide, and reach past and future destinations whilst leaving the body behind.